“Fashionably Dead” by Robyn Peterman

 photo 18455548_zpsf6280755.jpgVampyres don’t exist. They absolutely do not exist.

At least I didn’t think they did ‘til I tried to quit smoking and ended up Undead. Who in the hell did I screw over in a former life that my getting healthy equates with dead?

Now I’m a Vampyre. Yes, we exist whether we want to or not. However, I have to admit, the perks aren’t bad. My girls no longer jiggle, my ass is higher than a kite and the latest Prada keeps finding its way to my wardrobe. On the downside, I’m stuck with an obscenely profane Guardian Angel who looks like Oprah and a Fairy Fighting Coach who’s teaching me to annihilate like the Terminator.

To complicate matters, my libido has increased to Vampyric proportions and my attraction to a hotter than Satan’s underpants killer rogue Vampyre is not only dangerous . . . it’s possibly deadly. For real dead. Permanent death isn’t on my agenda. Avoiding him is my only option. Of course, since he thinks I’m his, it’s easier said than done. Like THAT’S not enough to deal with, all the other Vampyres think I’m some sort of Chosen One.

Holy Hell, if I’m in charge of saving an entire race of blood suckers, the Undead are in for one hell of a ride.

This is the first book I have read of Robyn Peterman’s and I just want to say…HOLY SHIT! GIVE ME MORE!!!!

The Review

Astrid is a Prada loving girl who knows she needs to quit smoking, especially since she’s about to lose a bet with her Best Friend Gemma.  When she goes to a voodoo “hypnotist” only to wake up the next day “dead” she thinks her Prada wearing days are over.  Boy was she wrong.

Between an Oprah Winfrey looking Guardian Angel, an Arnold Schwarzenegger looking Fairy, Demons and magical powers(oh my!), she thinks her life can’t get anymore stranger. Giiiirl Please! This is a Robyn Peterman book!

It didn’t take me more than this one book to figure out Robyn Peterman is a shoulda, coulda been comedian and an amazing writer!! I’m so happy she is dishing out laughter in books though. True comedy is a lost art form.  It ESPECIALLY takes skill to pull a real laugh out of a lone reader versus a person sitting in the midst of a large audience filled with those quick on the giggles.

I loved the Guardian Angel, Pam.  She’s hilarious, blunt and yet kind.  I smiled with each new name she came up with to call Astrid.(Asswipe, Assbag, etc)  Her “Fairy Fighting Friend” is named The Kevin.  No…not Kevin….THE Kevin. He thinks he’s a sex God and has absolutely no fashion sense.

When Astrid comes face to face with a Vampyre named Ethan, she has an immediate attraction to him.  When he starts projecting sexual images of what he’d like to do to her, she knows he’s someone she’d love to have on her to do list.  However he’s meeting two other vamps secretly and there are rogues out there killing innocents. Is he one of them or does he hold secrets she can’t even imagine?

Final Thoughts:  I seriously flippin’ LOVED this book/series/author!!! I’m thinking I might have to invent a new rating for books like this and a few others that I’ve thought to myself are so much more than 5 Stars!

Robyn Peterman is totally someone I’d love to be best friends with.  She’s hilarious, an amazing writer, cusses like a sailor and makes no apologies for it. Through her writing you get a distinct lesson on who she is as an author and as a person.  She’s definitely someone who I look forward to seeing MUCH more from and learning many more ways to say Astrid, with profanity involved.

“Fashionably Dead” is book 1 in The Hot Damned Series. As soon as I finished it, I went looking for more.  Unfortunately she hasn’t came out with it yet.  But SOON!  In the meantime she has other books out there and I can’t imagine them not living up to the standard this book has set.


*NOTE* Currently “Fashionably Dead” is free on Amazon, so get it while you can.  As always though, double check prices before buying.  You never know when prices will change. However, even if it’s no longer free, I can’t encourage you enough…GET THIS BOOK!!  READ IT AND LOVE IT!


Grade Scale:

(Based upon the Book Reads and Reviews Rubric)

  • Plot – 10
  • Characterization – 10
  • Style – 10
  • Threshold Quality – 10
  • Addictiveness – 10

Total – 50

Rating –5 Stars (And then some!)